live and let live.

Going through my drafts. I opened this one up that I wrote almost a year ago in December. I have no memory of writing it, what it's about, or even who. But I liked it. I'm posting it now for others to read. Thanks for indulging me in my random blog updates. =) 


I'm going to tell a story. If not for your pleasure then for my memory. 

So I was pmsing...

Getting mad at someone that didn't necessarily do anything wrong but in my eyes they were just being annoying. I was being super stubborn about the situation.  

Anthony was around for the whole exchange.

He called me on my shit. 

I got mad. 

But then he came back to me and said... 

"you know i think one of your best qualities is that you live and let live.." 

He went on to say that he admires this in me and it makes him try to do this as well and not be judgemental. I can honestly say that he made my attitude change right away. 

Wow. 

He thinks this of me. We have been together for 5 years and he has never said those words to me. It was a really awesome feeling to hear the person that you love say kind words to you about you. 

I just want to remember this. That someone thinks this of me. So when I start being judgy about something and I can reflect and know that someone looks up to me and that I should change my attitude.

I love Anthony for reminding me to act more like myself. 

Also,  wouldn't that be a cool tattoo? Live and Let Live. I like it. 

imperfection

You know those girls that can go to the gym, work out, and not even drip a sweat? The ones that can run and run then leave the gym and continue on with the rest of their day? Ya... I'm not one of them. When I work out, I'm like a man. I sweat and turn bright red. My hair is ruined and my makeup is gone. It's a bit annoying. I just returned from a little run/jog this evening and I'm dripping. If I had to go anywhere tonight I would have to shower and reapply everything. I feel like it's a good thing to sweat a lot though. It's like releasing all the bad toxins in your body. It's a natural coolant.

In that case, I wouldn't trade my sweaty back and my bright red face for the prior option. I need to learn to love my body for what it is... mine.

oh Dear...

Dear Autumn,
I dream about your cooler days. The fresh air. And the chilly nights. This 90+ weather is just too much. Let's take it down a notch. Si?

Dear NYC,
I miss you. Can we meet again soon?

Dear Marshalls Pasties,
I'm craving one ever since I walked into the place on Saturday. I think I'm going to come get a pasty tonight for dinner.

Dear Anthony,
I hope you feel better but I will beat you up if you get me sick. =)

Dear San Francisco,
I'm looking forward to my weekend visit in a few weeks. I hope it's sunny when I arrive. If not, I will forgive you since I know you can't help it.

Dear 49ers,
Will you please start playing like you were in preseason? I want to see a Win! Especially when I'm there watching you play against the Eagles.

Dear Friday,
You can come now.

question marks

You know how many times I have opened up bloggger and clicked on 'new post' and then starred at the blank white screen... thinking hmm.. i know there was something that I wanted to say, pictures i wanted to share...but I draw a blank. This blank space can be intimidating sometimes.

Every blogger is different on their level of openness. Some people just post happy posts. Things that they did, pictures, and keep it on a pretty basic level of who they are (Which is definitely not a bad thing!). While other bloggers put it all out there...they dive down deep to who they are as a person to how they feel, what scares them and what makes them happy. They are raw and open.

I guess I'm trying to figure out who I want to be as a member of this community.

News

Good news:

I sold my Tickets for the Saturday show to Rent and found better seats for the show on Sunday! Things happen for a reason.

Bad news:

I have a cold. Stuffy runny nose and the sinus pressure to go along with it. I just got done taking an antibiotic for a sinus infection.. go figure.

Exciting news:

I'm having Mexican food for dinner... Yep... that's just how exciting my life is.




Hope everyone is enjoying this lovely day, the 3rd day of February, 2010. Peace out.

Selfish

I'm having a selfish moment right now.

I was looking forward to seeing this when it came to town with original cast members...

But instead it looks like I will be doing this...

For my Grandma's funeral service.

I know that you can't predict life and you can't choose when someone leaves this world. And that there are disappointments around every corner. But I do try and look at the bright side of most things.

It's hard to look at the bright side when someone you love dies though and on top of that miss something that you were desperately looking forward to.

God...I'm so selfish.

Such is life.

today

I need:

♥ to get my butt to the gym.

♥ to stop letting the little things get to me.

♥ to clean my house.

♥ to learn how to motivate myself.

I want:

* to be a better person

* to start cooking more homemade meals

* to love exercising.

* to TRAVEL and see the world.

* to be happy everyday.


I feel:

.... tired of working 8-5, monday through friday.

..... emotional... it's that time of the month.

..... sad for the people suffering from the earthquake.



That's all for today. Catch you on the flip side.

What do we call it?

I was just recently asked if I thought it was "the beginning of a new decade or the end of one?"

I liked the question but I couldn't decide on my answer.

The end: The 00's were good. I was 13 when the clock struck midnight in 1999 turning into 2000. What an awesome age for the start of a new decade! It was my Coming of Age (cue music decade. It's when a lot of important things happen. First kisses, first boyfriends, first heartbreaks, drivers licenses, parties, becoming an adult, turning 21, graduations of all kinds (middle school, high school and college!), moving out of my parents, and so many more awesome firsts.

The Beginning: I have a feeling the 10's (how do we go about saying that?) will be just as awesome though. I'm thinking a new level of firsts are going to happen in this decade...Marriage, babies, turning 30 (EWWW), careers, travel, love, loss, and enlightenment. The decade of my adulthood. Crazy.

What do you think, the beginning or the end of a decade?

pondering

Do you ever wonder where the people from your past are? What they are doing? Who they have become?

People come in and out of your life in a matter of minutes, hours, days, months, and years. I feel the impact of this. I think the majority of people that i have spent time with have influenced my life in some form or another. It's crazy to think of the number of people this could amount to.

I was just reminiscing with Erica and thinking about all the fun times we have had together. Also the fact that I'm stepping back in time and having a Bunker Babe reunion this weekend has brought back a ton of old memories.

Have a good weekend!

Working and Thinking...

I have been doing a lot of thinking lately. I need some change in my life...



My boy and I are seriously thinking about moving. I want to move to New York City. He thinks it would be fun and cool too. That's my plan and my goal. I have never even been there before but it feels like I have. I do so much research on New York. I have wanted to live there since as long as I can remember. Everytime I think about it it gives me butterflies! I even started looking at flats in the city. Prices are so high there! I need to do some more research of what i can do for work!







I also have started to realize that I am kinda lame. I look at other peoples blogs and there are so many neat, creative, fun people in this world! It makes me want to be better, to have more of a drive in my life, to work toward something (small or big), and it also makes me want to be more creative! I have never really had much discipline in my life. I did the whole instrument thing in grade school until the beginning of highschool, then i did the whole organized team sport (paintball) and although i loved it, I never accomplished all that I wanted. Now I am here. I just want more out of this life! I guess I have been going through a bit of a quarter life crisis. I can't go back and change anything that I have done in this life and it scares me.