Scary Stuff.

Something kind of scary happened yesterday.

I wasn't going to talk about it. But I kind of feel the need.

I had a physical exam with my primary doctor last week. I have had this lump in my breast for some time. It hurts and more so when it's that time of the month. I really haven't been worried about it. My doctor wasn't too concerned either but sent a referral to the breast imaging center at the Hospital for an ultra sound.

I made my appointment the next day and had my Ultra Sound appointment yesterday.

Have you ever had an ultra sound? It's strange. Anyways, the tech found the little lump that has been giving me a hard time. She took some still shots. Told me to wipe off the goop and was going to go get the doctor. Ok cool. That's normal.

Doctor walks in. shakes my hand. Asks how I am? Then the weird question came..."so is anyone here with you? Mom? Sister?" ummm..no..why would they be..*freaking out...freaking out*.

I guess my little lump is a little concerning to him. It looks like a solid mass and it's a bit abnormal shaped. *FUCK*. I might have shed a few quick tears. He didn't want to upset me. I just couldn't help it.

They wanted to get me in for a biopsy on it that day. An hour appointment turned into half the day in this office. I had to wait in the waiting room..alone.... for an hour before going back for the biopsy.

Nurse Pat came and got me. What a sweet lady. Really pro-active in your (mine and hers) health. She made me feel comfortable. That's what I needed.

Back into the same room I had my ultra sound, i got prepped for the procedure. I got to watch on the screen as a needle with Novocaine went through my skin. I'm a little sick and twisted and am into that kind of stuff. But ouchy! I don't like getting shots there. Then they put a little slit into my skin and inserted the larger needle that would be going into the mass and gathering stuff for testing. Took a matter of 15 minutes from start to finish. Nurse Pat cleaned me up, put pressure on the wound (my blood was thin from a pill i took that morning) and got me an ice pack for soothing it later.

Dressed. Get me out of here.

I was a bit emotional all day. A little shaky feeling.

I get the results on Friday. Benign is what i would like the results to come back as. And you know what, in my heart I believe that it will be. But that evil brain of mine is making me think otherwise. If you (whoever is reading!) could please keep me in your thoughts? prayers? chants? whatever it is you do. I will be thankful. =)

Now, have a good day! Happy Cinco de Mayo! Happy Birthday to my mama!

xoxox